Wednesday, September 19, 2012

A showboat no more!


Told u to wake me up when September ends. Coz i hardly feel like blogging this month. Dunno why. Eheh.

Anwyays, just want to jot down this thought. I, naturally (since i can even remember) have been the type that is extrovert in character. Mostly. Not all the time. It doesn't happen when i'm not in the mood. Always been the one who wants to be heard in class, was the class monitor, prefect and head prefect in school, the frequent emcee in university events, love doing stage plays and sing in choirs and took part in simple musical performances... U know, all the so-called "glam" stuff lar! And faith has it, i'm  destined to be in one of the most "glamorous" profession on this planet! Tunggu nak keluar tv jer ni!!. Hahaha!!!

In fact it was hard to keep myself from being noticeable in a given particular setting! Tak caya, can ask the people who's been there to see it. Heck, i've even been "secretly" hated for this... Wait. Can't be a secret if i know about it right? So scratch that. But no worries. That is a COMMON misunderstanding towards me actually. I give them some time, coz in the end, they ALL (well most) end up becoming my good friends now. Biasalar jealous sana-sini mula-mula! Hahahahaah! ;P Tak kenal maka tak cinta! But that is of course if they WANT to be my friend. Ada jer yang still go on on this "envy" streak of theirs. Honestly, i malas nak layan and i'm still sticking to being that fabulous self!! So continue tengok jer lar k? Bahahahahaaha!

Ok. What am i doing?! Eeeuuwwww!!! Hehe. I don't mean to gloat. In fact it's not like me to gloat. Not publicly or purposely anyway. Plus, Allah tak suka orang bangga diri ni. Astaghfirullah! Dear God forgive me. But it is Him that bless me with such appealing (and awesome! ;P) characters that i'm ever soooo grateful for! So my thoughts today are not about boasting (camon! i wrote a post about this before here). But in fact to be thankful for the blessings i've been given in this short life on earth to be able to do the things i love! Now i'm in a more "glamourous" profession! I'm a mom! And this by far HAS TO BE the most glam of all becoz you can only get to be a mom if He allows you to! Job lain kena belajar and achieve at ur own capacity and effort (and His blessings of course), but this one is 100% given directly from Him! (ok effort pun kena adalar tapi). Syukur!

But despite it being THE JOB for me, i can't seem to help but noticing that motherhood has made me mellow and not showy-showy. I actually prefer to be behind the scenes and not showcase my effort or hard work! I know right?!! Me!!! haha! Maybe because i don't need anybody else's approval (or an audience for that matter!) on how my son (and future children insyaAllah!) will turn out to be, except His. So knowing He is ever watching, i do it privately lor! That, and because i don't want external interference on what i'm doing or plan to do! Hahaha! Tu jugak sebenarnya! ;P

But that's me. And yes. I actually like it! *clap clap for mommyhood!* I mean don't get me wrong. I'm not becoming introversive or anything. I'm still the chatty me. But minus the.. Err.. Swagger/bravado?! Haha!

That's all for now. By the way, Yusuf is 7 months today. Alhamdulillah. This is an update. Not a gasconade! ;P

Si budak yang suka swimming! *love*

Disclaimer: nak tulis pasal berhenti showing off, but the top two main paragraphs are full of 'em!! kira grand closing lar ni! boleh? hehehe!

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