Salam and good day everyone.
Haven't been in the bloggesphere due to a few reasons of late. But in the light of recent events where certain news that highlights troubled kids at school, underage rape and abuse, it couldn't catch my attention enough that i decided to lay down my thoughts about it.
Believe it or not, i don't read the newspapers. Not anymore anyway. In fact, since i've started working, i decided this after reading a few headlines that only showcases gruesome horrible stories of crimes everywhere daily. Therefore i simply don't find the need to know and pollute my mind about these things. It just convinces me to summarize that the world out there is getting scarier by the minute. Not to mention dangerous.
If you ask me, the earth is in dire need of mothering. Not just the simplest form of mothering, but the full "this-is-my-job" mothering. Another word would be "serious". As much as in denial we may be, we all know for a fact that good parenting, especially mothering would "save" the world from filling up with these immoral people. Yes, intelligence is important too, but without moral values, this is where you'll hear stories of a teacher sexually harassing his students. He's obviously not that stupid.
If mothers were to play their part in continously dedicating their lives to nurture well mannered and god-fearing sons, the effect will only be the growth of gentlemen that respects women that they treat them as how they would like their mother or sister to be treated. And if mothers have the time to inculcate lessons to their daughters on how important it is to hold themselves of high regards and value, they would not end up dressing half nakedly in the streets without feeling any shame. Unless you think someone like nicki minaj is cool-worthy to be idolized, then pleaseeeee don't be surprise if your daughter ends up parading her "superbass" in public. *sigh*
I can't imagine anyone else be doing this job other than moms. Sure, u can say that u can do it after coming back from work. If this was the case, then there would not be any social illnesses erupting everywhere and you have automatically proven God's best method for a person's good personal development and growth, imperfect. And you're also implying nak hasilkan anak soleh-solehah ni boleh buat part-time jer (5 hours only?)! Forgive me, but that has got to be the biggest news (or joke!) of the year. =(
Of course, all good things with huge rewards needs initial sacrifice, blood, sweat and tears. And also patience. It's not meant to be easy. If the child can speak, he would cry out his rights to a full-time mom the minute he's delivered into this world. Talks of sacrificing our lives to work for the income is totally selfish i must say. For when you work, you're not the one sacrificing. It's your kid. It's as if they would say "ok mom. Since work is so important to you than being here with me, i sacrifice my given rights of our time together so you can maintain your lifestyle." Of course this dialogue don't really apply to single moms. And perhaps to a poor family. But then again, they wouldn't have had debts of paying a honda city since they can't afford it in the first place. Neither can they afford to send their kids to a babysitter and pay them. So they would have less expectations and live within their means. Buying new handbags and clothes won't kill them.
And if your kids can really point out to you, i bet my bottom dollar that they don't prefer other alternatives to your time with them with new clothes or toys. They don't need them. They need you. I mean really, can they even ask or know to ask for these things at that age? Can new clothes be really up to par to having you around for him when he needs you? Are they even impress that those lifeless things can replace the responsive you? It's probably because we were not loved enough before this that we ended up being materialistic and have the love for inanimate things instead of acknowledging human contact as the form of real love? If this is so, then expect the same cycle to repeat to your child my friends.
I am not here to scrutinize or judge the way you choose your priorities in life. It's just my duty as a muslim to share what i know, so that yes, YOU will benefit them. I know i could easily be 'kedekut' about it and get the benefits all to myself. But thinking Yusuf might end up marrying a girl that is a product of that kind of parenting, scares the heck out of me. Who doesn't wish the best for their child right? So it's not too late to grow a conscience.
I guess i'm done here. I don't expect anyone to agree with my opinion. In fact i'll prolly get indirect twitter or facebook status updates of how annoyed you are about it. In psychology, that is a form of you indirectly agreeing to what i've said but childishly denying it coz you obviously feel bad not doing it. Simply because you have an ego the size of mount kinabalu. But don't worry. I won't tell anyone.
But the fact remains. Education before execution. (It's my tagline now! hehe!). Please don't tell me that crap that being a mother makes you automatically professional at the job. i mean seriously. Even a smoker needs to learn how to smoke first before he can perfect it and becomes a chimney. Nak masak pun tengok buku recipe. Ini kan pulak nak jadi mak. Takkan main hentam ikut firasat masing-masing kan? Therefore, i sincerely wish you all the best. In managing your children and doing what's best (and morally right) for them. I'm sure you have your reasons if you think otherwise. But hopefully it's the one that makes you (or your partner, if he's the stern cause for your time away from your responsibilities), sleep soundly at night and at ease to explain your actions when the time comes for you to meet your maker.
Mommies, i care for all of yous. (yeah! believe it!) May He forgive our ignorance and bless us with enough "time" to correct our mistakes. InsyaAllah. All the best to us.
“Be in this world as though you were a stranger or a traveler/wayfarer.” - Bukhari.
Duration of life on earth equates to a musafir (traveller)'s short rest underneath a tree before continuing his journey. That's how brief it is.